18 months ago today, (actually Wednesday, since this didn’t get posted on time!) life changed big time and I have been on a roller coaster ever since. Sometimes life feels like it is doing constant loops and other times it just seems to be racing straight ahead so fast I can’t see where the track is leading. There have been surprise tunnels, quick turns and slow chugging up big hills. I have experienced those breath-taking moments right before the drop and the times you hold on more tightly than you thought possible because you are just certain you are going to fall out and hit the pavement. The one thing I haven’t experienced is the ride’s end; perhaps that’s actually a good thing. I may not like being on a roller coaster – emotionally or in the natural! – but at least I’m still on the ride!
One thing we like to tell people when they face hard situations is “it will get easier.” I’ve said it myself many times. It’s true, but not always in the way we mean it. “Easier”, in my case, hasn’t meant “back to normal” which is what we seem to imply will happen. As a family we have had some fun times over the last year and a half, but they haven’t been all we’re used to because a key person is missing. We are adjusting, forging a new normal, but to say that’s easier isn’t so – not just yet.
We are grateful to have celebrated my mom and dad’s 50th Wedding Anniversary! Not many families get to do that these days and my three siblings and I and all the subsequent in-laws and grandkids are proud to have parents who are such good examples and love us, each other and God with all their being. We spent a long weekend together along the Ohio River and, as usual, enjoyed being together just having fun. Eric and I will never get to celebrate our 50th anniversary but I will celebrate with gusto alongside all in our family who do!
We also welcomed a new blessing into the family. On July 9th, Owen Eric Timothy VanBuskirk made his arrival after a long day of labor. My daughter-in-law, Kristyn, allowed me the privilege of being with her, Christopher and her mom Karen during those hours and the delivery. She could not have given me a more meaningful gift than allowing me to share that experience with them. It was a long day with a couple of really hard hours toward the end and I am so proud of the way she handled things and made decisions with her son in mind instead of herself. There were times her mom and I were almost in tears but she never lost her focus or wavered in her determination. Owen was born and we all cheered and felt relief that labor was over. He is a blessing with beautiful eyes and parents and a big sister who adore him.
We have also made it through Father’s Day, Kids Camp, summer and vacation without Eric. Perhaps that doesn’t sound like such a big deal to you, but, believe me, to us it’s progress. We have remodeled a room in the house and that’s a big deal. We’ve had to handle situations without Eric’s wisdom or prayers for direction and that’s big deal. But we’re making it. We’re discovering our way and trying to do our best. Unless you have been where we are, it’s hard to describe just how many things change. Even when you know someone is a central point in your life, when they are no longer here you realize how many ways they impacted your daily life and how much a part of you they really were.
God has picked us up, directed us, forgiven us, encouraged us, challenged us, and been patient, gentle and constant. I do not know how people handle such life changing events without Him – or why they’d want to. I am grateful for the many people He has placed around us who have prayed, called, sent cards, listened, advised or given hugs. Without you, this road would be tougher, longer and lonelier. You are as appreciated now as you were 18 months ago when all this was new to us. Thank you.
Enjoy the remaining summer days and soak up all the sunshine you can. Make sure you tell someone today how special they are. Take time to hug the one(s) you love. Smile and remember God is crazy in love with you (to quote a friend!)!!
Now may the God of peace make you holy in every way,
and may your whole spirit and soul and body be kept blameless
until our Lord Jesus Christ comes again.
God will make this happen, for he who calls you is faithful.
Dear brothers and sisters, pray for us.
I Thessalonians 5:23-25
JEV 