But as for me,
I know that my Redeemer lives,
I will see him for myself.
Yes, I will see him with my own eyes.
I am overwhelmed at the thought.
Job 19:25, 27
Eric VanBuskrik September 28, 1951 – February 19, 2008
I remember this evening four years ago. I remember how hopeful I was and certain that the fight against cancer would end the way we wanted, the way we prayed it would. It didn’t.
I remember after that how I hated Tuesdays and 6:30 AM. Irrational, I know, but I did. Thursdays (our day off) were empty and I hated going to church without him. It was hard doing everything without him. Sometimes, even breathing was hard. I truly felt as though I was walking through the ‘valley of the shadow of death’ and thought I was going to live there forever.
This night, though sad and full of memories, is not as hard as it has been the past few years. By that I mean I’m not spending the evening crying – or trying not to! Several times this week I have relived my last hours with Eric and there is a pit in my stomach and a catch in my throat and tears, definitely tears, but I’m not in the ‘valley’. God has been faithful just as He said He would and I am oh, so thankful.
I miss Eric and I wonder what things would be like for our family if he was still here. We have grandkids that have never known him and kids that could use his advice from time-to-time. I’ve bought a new couch, painted a few walls, drive a different car and have made friends he never met. I can’t help but wonder what things would be like with his input.
But we have his legacy; his life of faithfulness to God, love of prayer and joy in seeing others receive the salvation Jesus offers all of us. I know he would be more focused on our spiritual walk than what color the living room is! He taught us well and I hope he is pleased with all of us.
So, we embark on year number 5. Sigh. Thank you all for loving us and holding us close in your heart. I wish to remind you of a scripture which was the heartbeat of Eric’s life, a message he would want you all to remember:
Pray without ceasing.
1 Thessalonians 5:17
Goodnight, Handsome. Can’t wait to have you tell me all about what you are experiencing!
JEV 
I miss him TONS Miss Jeannette & I can’t amagine what you are going through :(. I love u & so do many other people. You are an amazing person. You have been such a good influense on my life. Just remember that you will see him again one day in the gloryous beautiful heaven. (sorry if I spelled that wrong)
Ciara, I love you. You have been such a treasure to me. I’m sure Eric would be so thrilled to see the fine young lady you have grown to be!
This was really nice to read. God bless you and thanks for posting!
Thanks, Coleen. Please tell Tom thanks for bailing me out a few weeks ago; well for having Tim come bail me out! It’s rare I lock my keys in the car and it’s nice to know there’s someone I can trust when I do!
I love the peace that only GOD can give during a loss this great. I also love that you are able to share this peace and hope with all of us. It is encouraging and helps to strengthen our faith as well! Thanks for sharing your heart. Love and prayers. 🙂
Thanks for reading, Sandy. You are right that only GOD can successfully walk us through this type of loss. Perhaps I’ll see you sometime this summer and one of those family gatherings!
I miss Eric too, a lot.
I bet he’d be surprised at how many of us still miss him!
I think that everything composed was actually very logical.
But, consider this, what if you were to write a killer headline?
I am not suggesting your content is not good, but what
if you added a title to possibly get folk’s attention? I mean Year #4 | JEV is a little vanilla. You could peek at Yahoo’s home
page and see how they create article headlines to get
viewers to click. You might add a video or a pic or two to get readers excited
about everything’ve written. Just my opinion, it could make your posts a little livelier.
I think I replied to this ages ago but my account shows differently so I didn’t want to take the chance and have it seem like I didn’t care; I really appreciate this advice…. and I agree with you! I’ll see how things come out for the blog soon to come. Thanks for caring!